It was eye-opening and powerful – especially the talanoa we had.
For one South Auckland teacher, the Atu-Mai sexual violence prevention training has changed how he responds and listens to kids.
“When I first heard about it, I knew it was going to be a heavy topic because it’s not something we talk lightly about,” he said.
Mafi Tavo is a Dean at Tangaroa College teaching English and Technology.
Staunchly from Otara, he says in Pasifika culture this topic is always viewed as taboo and something we push to the side.
“I’ve definitely changed how I approach certain situations now – how I respond and listen,” he said.
Instead, he says the child should be at the centre of it so we can better serve them and normalise that conversation.
“The first day was full on, it was mentally heavy and a lot to take in,” he said.
He came to the Atu-Mai training with an open mind and then went away with more clarity on how to deal with a sexual violence situation or disclosure at school.
“It was eye-opening and powerful, especially the talanoa we had. And I did walk away feeling like that because it was an eye-opener but also reflected how important it was.”
“I also realised how important our role is as leaders to hold this space, the vā for our kids and making those connections to better serve them.
Mafi found many key concepts and strategies helpful in a school context, like talanoa for courageous conversations which is a tool he implements as best practice.
More importantly, he recognised the trusting yourself, establishing relationships and being a good, active listener makes a difference.
“I’m just taking more of that reflective approach now and listening more. I think we are more inclined to listen to respond with a solution, rather than just listening to hold space,” he says.
“Maybe sometimes that’s all they need – understanding and knowing what to do next and who to refer to because it’s not just yours alone to carry.”
Mafi says Le Va’s Atu-Mai training has given him space to take a more holistic approach and take that time to truly understand and better serve our kids.
Reporting abuse and knowing where to get help
If you need to talk to someone now, help is available. Confidential support is available for those feeling unsure and needing to talk to someone about child sexual abuse.
If someone is in danger
If you or someone else is in immediate danger, call the Police on 111.
If you or a young person needs someone to talk to
Safe to talk
Support for those impacted by sexual harm.
Call: 0800 044 334
Text: 4334
Email: support@safetotalk.nz
Live webchat: www.safetotalk.nz
1737
Support from trained counsellors
Call or text: 1737
Youthline
Youth helpline service & face-to-face counselling.
Call: 0800 376 633
Text: 234
Email: talk@youthline.co.nz
If the young person is in an unsafe environment:
Oranga Tamariki
Free call: 0508 326 459
Email: enquiry@ot.govt.nz
Support for those who have experienced sexual abuse:
Victim Support: 0800 842 846
Rape Crisis: 0800 88 33 00
HELP: Call: 24/7, 0800 623 1700 (24-hour HELPline); Email: gethelp@helpauckland.org.nz; Text: 8236
Survivors Network of those Abused by Priests (SNAP): 022 344 0496
